Cellular: Movie & DVD Review (2004)

(Originally published 2004)

The thriller “Cellular” is a preposterous, winning joke. It’s so much fun, you happily sustain disbelief throughout, accepting its many plot holes, its questionable lapses in logic and its occasional line of bad dialogue with a “who cares?” attitude.

The movie is a stunt, for sure, but it’s a stunt that entertains. It’s solely focused on giving audiences a rush and a good time, and it succeeds.

What makes it work are several elements that come together to create a satisfying snap—the game cast and the terrific chase scenes, the handful of clever twists, director David Ellis’ savvy balance of humor, drama and tension, and its cutting comment on our cell phone-obsessed culture.

Can you hear me now, folks? This is a good movie.

The film was conceived by Larry Cohen, who wrote “Phone Booth,” another film about the importance of staying connected in an increasingly disconnected world. That movie was good, but this one surpasses it. So here’s to Cohen--a lifetime’s worth of unlimited, anywhere minutes for his trouble.

In the film, Kim Basinger is Jessica Martin, a teacher who gets brutally abducted by a handful of angry toughs who manhandle her from her home, shoot her maid in the back (the cowards), take Jessica to an unknown locale, and toss her into an attic.

There, just behind her on a wooden post, is a phone that’s quickly smashed apart by the lead kidnapper (Jason Statham). After threatening to kill her for reasons unclear to Jessica, he leaves her in the attic, where she eventually is drawn to the faint sound of a buzzing dial tone.

Hands shaking, body trembling, Jessica turns to the damaged phone and realizes it might work with a little handiwork. Feverishly, she starts twisting wires and tapping for a connection—any connection—until she gets one. Soon, she’s pleading with a complete stranger, slacker Ryan (Chris Evans), on his cell phone. If Jessica can somehow convince him that she has indeed been kidnapped by a group of men who now are out to get her son and husband, it will Ryan’s day to shine.

But is this just a prank call? Initially, Ryan thinks so—and then he believes otherwise when he hears Jessica being slapped around on the other end. Determined to help, he bolts into action, with William H. Macey’s Sgt. Bob Mooney eventually joining the case, which is steeped in corruption.

What’s impressive about “Cellular” isn’t just its blistering pace, but how many layers director Ellis and screenwriter Chris Morgan mine from its thin premise. The underused Basinger is vulnerable yet no fool as Jessica, Macey once proves again he can step into any role and make it memorable, and the relatively unknown Evans has just the right likable energy to become a star.

Grade: A-