2 Fast 2 Furious: Movie Review, DVD Review (2003)

(Originally published 2003)

Directed by John Singleton, written by Michael Brandt and Derek Haas, 94 minutes, rated PG-13.

John Singleton's street-racing movie, "2 Fast 2 Furious," a sequel to the surprise 2001 hit, "The Fast and the Furious," offers audiences solid answers to that age-old question: Exactly how does one become too fast and too furious?

Apparently, doing so involves more than just having the right muscle car or, for that matter, the right muscles. There’s a dress code involved: Miami-tramp contemporary seems to work best for the ladies as does cabana-boy casual for the men.

Regardless of gender, hair should be tipped, teased and tousled, as if you just hopped out of bed--preferably somebody else’s. Tattoos and implants are encouraged, as are piercings, but nothing is ever as important as having the proper orthodontia. Indeed, to be truly too fast and too furious, one must have the sort of pearly whites that sparkle handsomely against one’s sun-kissed skin.

As directed by Singleton from a script by Michael Brandt and Derek Haas, "2 Fast 2 Furious,” set in south Florida, deserves a dressing down. It’s too much of a dim bulb to live up to its title, too long-winded to be considered quick, let alone fast.

Initially, it seems as if it’s going to continue the fun, cartoonish ride offered in the first movie, but it doesn’t go the distance. By its midpoint, it gets bogged down in a silly drug cartel plotline that's taken so seriously, the film loses the giddy spunk that made its predecessor so enjoyably dumb and over-the-top.

In the film, Paul Walker reprises his role as Brian O'Connor, a ruined ex-cop who lays to rest any questions about his masculinity in the hilarious opening scene, which finds him showing up for an illegal street race in an elaborately festooned muscle car that snorts great bursts of steam from its vented hood. It’s an inspired touch, one of only a few in the movie.

After Brian crosses the finish line, he’s busted by the cops and quickly--too quickly--is offered a deal: If he agrees to help the impossibly curvaceous undercover cop, Monica (Eva Mendes), nail the impossibly swarthy drug lord, Carter (Cole Hauser), his record will be wiped clean. Brian agrees, but only after enlisting the help of his childhood friend cum enemy, Roman (Tyrese), an ex-con with an attitude the size of a semi who takes the place of Vin Diesel as Brian’s main man.

The problem with “2 Fast 2 Furious” isn’t just that it’s no longer running on Diesel, but that it’s well-intentioned--it wants to be about something, which is sweet, but a shame. The first film never wanted to be anything more than just a throwback to the hot rod films of the 1950s; its kitschy embrace of a forgotten subculture was part of its charm. Worse for “2 Furious,” there’s nothing about it that sets it apart from the pack. It’s just sort of there, revving its engines and racing around street corners with no place to go.

Singleton ("Boyz N the Hood,” “Poetic Justice," "Shaft") probably wasn’t the best choice of directors. He’s too literal-minded for this sort of thing, too earnest, and, in the end, the story he tells feels like a ho-hum version of “Miami Vice.”

Grade: C-