"Legion" Movie Review (2010)

1/22/2010 Posted by Admin

Movie Review

"Legion"

Directed by Scott Stewart, written by Stewart and Peter Schink, 100 minutes, rated R.

By our guest blogger, Spencer Morton


There’s really no point in beating around the bush with this review. “Legion” is dreadful. Have the makers of this movie not learned anything from countless other apocalypse films? “Legion” literally has nothing going for it. The acting is putrid. The story is non-existent, as is the action. The pacing needs work and the visuals weren’t eye-opening by any means.

I love to laugh and listen to stand-up comedians, but nothing I’ve heard in a while is as hilarious as the plot of “Legion.” God has lost faith in mankind. He calls upon his angel army generals Michael [Paul Bettany] and Gabriel [Kevin Durand] to rain down the wrath of God upon the world. There is one person who can save the world from this impending apocalypse, an unborn baby in the belly of waitress at a run-down Mojave Desert diner. Michael and Gabriel must kill this child before it has a chance to lead.

Michael rebels. He still loves humans as God once did. He still sees a glimmer of hope. Michael drops down from heaven and holes up in the diner with eight lowly citizens. Their task--fight off swarms of angel-possessed peeps, protect the waitress long enough for the baby to be born, defeat the angel Gabriel, and run off to safeguard mankind’s last remaining hope.

Stupidest plot ever? Possibly. Still, stupid movies do hold a dear place in my heart. They can be very entertaining. “Legion” isn’t one of those movies. With a film like this, one is expecting immense amounts of action, violence, slick visuals and at the very least, entertainment.

This film fails on all accounts.

While there might be one good action scene, the rest are just a familiar hodgepodge of random explosions and gunfire. By "the rest," I mean the one other action sequence. This is the most boring end of days type of film ever. Conversations and pointless dialogue drag on too long. During one lull, waitress Charlie (Adrianne Palicki) asks, “Is it over?” Sitting there, I prayed for the same thing. Perhaps director Scott Stewart was aiming for some character development. He missed the target.

While watching this piece of trash, I kept thinking to myself, whenever the people in the diner run out of ammo (they never do, obviously), they can just kill the angels with the actors' God-awful acting. The cast of “Legion” is about as random as some crazy old lady biting people in the neck and zipping around a room like a spider (this actually happens in the movie). Dennis Quaid plays Bob, the owner of the diner. His son Jeep (seriously, his name is Jeep) is played by a cringe-inducing Lucas Black. Throw in a little Tyrese Gibson and Charles S. Dutton, and what do we have? Nothing.  Really, we have nothing.

Bettany is solid as the Archangel Michael--we'll give the film that. He is cool and composed. All the other actors seem to be taking their roles way too seriously. Bettany is relaxed, and his performance benefits from it. Durand hardly gets any screen time, which is a shame because he’s always devilishly good.

The ending of the film mirrored the rest of it in that it was amazingly unsatisfying. One character asks another, “What do I do?” The other responds, “Have faith.” What a cheesy, cop-out way to end a movie. Let’s not try and explain what will happen to the characters after the film ends. That would be too complicated. Let’s just say a religious play on words, something witty like, “Have faith.”

Consider this reviewer a non-believer.

Do yourself a favor and watch “The Terminator” instead. “Legion” clearly derives a bulk of its material from the James Cameron gem, but comes nowhere near its iconic status.  “Legion” is hellishly bad.

Grade: F

View the trailer for "Legion" below.  What are your thoughts?


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8 comments:

  1. renantech said...

    I read lots of blogs on this movie an i already watch the trailer it was very nice.. Where to watch the movie online for free? you can an idea where to watch i am so excited to wath the movie.. Sikat ang Pinoy

  2. S.Hay said...

    I disagree. I liked it. Obviously it was not the best movie, or even close. But I found it an entertaining action movie. Lots of gunfire and explosions are good when you're not in the mood for a downer plot and a load of heartache (which other apocalyptic movies tend to give). This is a great movie if you just want something to watch without really getting attached to the characters.

    I do agree that some/most of the dialogue between the main (human) characters was cliche, and unneeded. And you're right, the acting for some of the cast could have been much better, but some of them did a wonderful job. I also admit I only wanted to see it because of Kevin Durand and Paul Bettany, and they certainly did deliver. (I also agree that Kevin needed more screen time. Haha) But I think it was interesting and fun.

    As for the ending, I think it leaves it open so they can make a sequel if they choose too (which could result in Kevin and Paul getting more screen time anyway), so I liked it. It was simple, and left open.

    Plus, the movie clocks in at 100 minutes. It's not very long, so it isn't as if you're stuck in a theater for three hours banging your head against the wall.

    The music was wonderful too, which is what really sold it for me.

    Maybe I'm just easy to entertain, but I, for one, enjoyed Legion. It's not a film for everyone, but I liked it. :)

  3. Anonymous said...

    It was Great!- Paul Bettany's performance that is, as always. NONE of the other actors could compare nor keep up, especially not kevin durand.
    But the movie was still awesome and extremely entertaining, the plot wasnt that horrible. And the best thing besides the fact that paul bettany was in it, was that dennis quaid dies! Which is wonderful, always.
    GRADE:A

  4. Anonymous said...

    The trailer for this movie was better than the actual thing. The movie was semi entertaining however the scenes leading up to the end don't make any sense and the ending was complete and udder bullshit. (spoiler) the way that Jeep got the marks of the angle literally had no purpose. It's like the writers changed their minds, but instead of taking that part out just left it in. Finlay, the last scene in the car where Charlie quoted her mother was literally the dumbest and worst placed movie line in any movie I have ever seen. The music implies that God is still not satisfied with humanity, and i viewed it as either a careless shitty ending, or a set up for a sequel. Either way, this movie is very unsatisfying although the trailer looks good do your self a favor and don't even waste your time watching this movie even if you can manage to get it for free.

  5. Anonymous said...

    probably the worst movie i have ever seen. I think the angels looked cool, but the other 95% just makes you feel dumb for watching it. God, who apparently is not powerful in this movie, nor perfect, commands the destruction of the world by possessing humans with angels. Apparently the angels love zombie movies because that's all it was. A whacked out ZOMBIE movie with desperate twist. The twist made it even a horrible zombie movie.

  6. Anonymous said...

    Well, throughout the Bible God changes his mind all the time such as in the story of Jonah. God was about to destroy the city of Ninevah, but later realized that He love the people too much to do so.
    And angels do disobey God (Satan).
    As for the reason, in the movie Michael states that it was because of Jeep, his staunch unmoving faith inspired Michael to disobey the order.

    The symbolism in the story is very great. the child being born has nothing to do with prophecy, it has to do with the fact that Michael knew God well enough that he could overturn God’s decision, just as Jeep had changed his.

    Charlie, the pregnant woman does not care at all about the ‘bastard’ child of hers. She even smokes. And clearly states that she “hates” the her unborn child. (Similar God’s situation in this movie, hating His creation). When the child is born, the world is not safe. Michael says, you must raise this child to be a good man. In other words, love this child because it is your responsibility. (Similar to God having to be responsible).

    At the end when Gabriel is about to kill Charlie and her child at the top of the mountain, Gabriel demands Charlie to hand over the child (whom she did not love) to him. She says “No.” Because she was starting to feel some affection towards it.

    When the all powerful, all seeing, all loving God sees this action of Charlie he realizes that if this woman who created this child whom she hated from the beginning is willing to die for her child and love it, should not I, the all loving God love my creation so much more than this woman loves her bastard child?

    God decides to cancel the extermination, and revives Michael, ordering him to stop Gabriel.
    That is why Michael says, “I gave Him what He needed.” to Gabriel.

    Very deep movie.

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