Snooki to Get Her Own Line of Products

1/06/2011 Posted by Admin

Snooki to Get Her Own Line of Products

Celebrity (*cough*) News

By our guest blogger, Joe Oliveto


Want to dress, look and act like Snooki from MTV’s “Jersey Shore”? What’s wrong with you? That’s like a guy deciding he wants to adopt the personal style of Kid Rock because he’s got it in his head that it will help him attract women.

Well, in a moment of subjectivity, I’m going to personally comment and say that, as a man, I wouldn’t recommend that any girl take after Snooki if she wants to be more appealing to the male sex. It used to be that The Jersey Devil was the scariest mythological creature associated with the Garden State. Now, it’s an over-tanned and diminutive guidette who will sneak into your house at night to drink all your vodka and steal your dignity.

Well, it doesn’t look like I have a say in the matter, because according to The Hollywood Reporter, Snooki has just made a deal with SRG Ventures to release her own personal line of products. We don’t know too many of the specifics, but we have heard that the goods being offered are just as horrible as you would imagine them to be: fuzzy slippers, obnoxious sunglasses, jewelry that a mob wife would consider gaudy, etc.

Snooki’s just the latest star of “Jersey Shore” to branch out. The Situation was on “Dancing With the Stars” and wants to become a real actor. JWoww has a book coming out, which is tough to believe when you consider that most of her fans probably can’t read, anyway.

See, I thought the whole point of Snooki and the rest of her crew was that they were an embarrassment to the human race and we laughed at their ridiculous fashion sense. Are there actually people who will buy these products?

Yeah, probably.

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