Coyote Ugly: Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

Directed by David McNally, written by Gina Wendkos, 101 minutes, rated PG-13.

David McNally’s “Coyote Ugly” is like “Cocktail” on estrogen, “Flashdance” on testosterone, “42nd Street” on crack.

It takes strands of each film’s genetic code and winds them around a film whose story audiences have seen countless of times before: A promising, likable upstart with doe eyes and bright teeth leaves a small town for the brighter shine--and sharper bite--of a big city.

Will she realize her dreams of becoming--in this case--a successful songwriter? Since the film is produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, the man responsible for such subtle hits as, well, “Flashdance,” it’s fair to say that audiences will know going into it that this curvaceous little pot of golden naiveté (Piper Perabo) won’t ever be able to do so until she first participates in something close to a wet T-shirt contest at a popular bar known as Coyote Ugly.

“Coyote Ugly” isn’t a bad film; even in a scene where a bunch of boozy women hoot and holler while setting flame to the top of a whisky-soaked bar, it has a certain knuckle-dragging charm. But it’s comprised of so many parts and pieces of other films, it mirrors those bothersome Olsen twins in that it has no identity of its own.

Worse, the film is like watching a patchwork of movie reruns; sitting there, you know you’ve seen all of this before--and can’t quite believe you’ve parted with money to see it all again.

Amazingly, the filmmakers seem to know this and thus pay considerable attention to dressing up the shopworn script with good cinematography, sharp editing, a smattering of late-‘80’s pop songs and a handful of fair performances.

With the exception of Tyra Banks, whose manic, hyperactive character should have been named Coyote Cleavage instead of Zoe, “Coyote Ugly” features Perabo (“The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle”) as Violet, John Goodman as her doting father, Adam Garcia as her attentive boyfriend, and Maria Bello as the bar’s ballsy owner.

You've never seen such caterwauling.

Grade: C-