“Hannah Montana” is Ending in 2011 and Apparently Ray Liotta Has Something To Do With It

By our guest blogger, Marie Biondolillo

All good things must come to an end, and "Hannah Montana," the gritty Disney series starring noted jailbait duchess Miley Cyrus as a charming alcoholic cop navigating Baltimore’s failed social justice systems, is no exception. The Disney Channel has announced that the groundbreaking drama will end in 2011, and that Ray Liotta will be heavily featured in the series’ final season.

You guys, what are we going to do? This is a worse catastrophe than the cancellations of "Freaks and Geeks," "Firefly" and "Arrested Development" put together! Obviously, Hannah Montana is just too smart for standard cable. Mainstream audiences can’t handle the show’s nuanced writing, complicated storylines, and envelope-pushing critiques of American capitalism. But there’s gotta be a channel with the balls to air it--what about HBO? Hell, what about Showtime?

Crushing depression about the demise of the show aside, I’m quite pumped for the debut of Ray Liotta. I wonder if he’s being brought on as a possible love interest for Cyrus? Ooh la, la! Maybe the fourth season of "Hannah Montana" will be about Hannah and Liotta pulling off some small-time cons, steadily working their way up the ladder of organized crime, and then becoming major mob figures (who also are in love.) Everything is going swell until Hannah’s hair-trigger temper (and burgeoning coke problem) cause her to imprudently murder a made man, forcing Liotta and Hannah to embark on a dangerous game of cat-and-mouse with vengeful local mafia dons. The series will end with Liotta and Hannah vanishing into the Witness Protection Program, glad to escape with their lives but questioning just how much those lives are worth, since they are forever barred from the glamorous world of organized crime--the only place where they can truly be themselves.

Oh "Hanna Montana," we hardly knew ye. Like John Keats, you have been cut down before your time.

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